Posted by: braddenvillage | January 3, 2011

January Funnies – Snow!

 

January Funnies – Snow!

Because the play-offs were closing in, my son Kevin’s high-school football team practiced daily. At the end of each practice, his coach would ask one player to pick an exercise they hadn’t done that day. With snow falling heavily one blustery November afternoon, Kevin was chosen. He looked around at his tired teammates and called out, “Snow angels!” Immediately his coach yelled, “All right, men, drop and give me ten good snow angels!” And 45 young men dropped without hesitation

Maria Puddister, Guelph (from Tales Out of School, 2002)


For show and tell, my seven-year-old son invited his 97-year-old great-grandma to class. She told the children she’d taught in a one-room schoolhouse in the early ’20s. She described how she had snowshoed to school across fields when the snow was deep and said that sometimes the farmer she boarded with allowed her the use of a horse.

She told the children she taught eight grades at once, that each day an older student came early to light the potbellied stove, that desks were built for two, and that there were inkwells and an outhouse.

Finally, she asked if there were any questions. One eager boy’s hand shot up. “Do you still have the horse?” he asked.

Holly Gerke (from Tales Out of School, 2004)


One day, my parents and I took a drive into the Fraser Valley. As we approached Langley, Mount Baker rose ahead of us, glistening with snow. After stopping for lunch, we decided to head back. Once on the road, my father asked where I was going, so I explained we were on our way home. A short time later, he asked again. Oh, dear, I thought, he’s becoming forgetful. I patiently told him we were going home. Then he asked, “When did they move Mount Baker?”

I was going the wrong way.

Elsie Mussell, Westbank, B.C. (from Reader Contributions, 2001)


I was standing at the window admiring the beauty of our first blanket of snow. “Beautiful,” my husband agreed. “Breathtaking…especially when you pick up a shovel.”

Josie McLaughlin, Sudbury, Ont. (from Reader Contributions, 1999)


Without fail — rain, hail, sleet or snow — my dad rode his bike to work. However, when he retired, to replace his biking he started walking every day. On one occasion, he met his friend, who asked, “How are you doing, Roel?”

Dad replied proudly: “I just went for my beauty walk. What do you think?”

His friend looked him up and down and replied with a smile, “You didn’t walk far enough.”

Lena Wilms, Lindsay, Ont. (from Reader Contributions, 1999)

On the day my husband and I got married, a snowstorm made the highways treacherous for the guests travelling to our wedding. During the 100-kilometre drive to our town, my cousin’s three young boys made a game of counting the vehicles that had ended up in the ditch. They had just passed the sixth one when my cousin lost control of their slow moving car and it slid off the road. After a few seconds of stunned silence, their oldest boy yelled, “Seven!”

Angela Bilski, Abee, Alta. (from Reader Contributions, 1999)

A blizzard had left a snow bank about halfway up our french doors. The cats liked to walk on it and peer in almost eyeball to eyeball with us. One night as we were sitting in the living room, my husband glanced up and muttered, “Peeping toms.”

Marlace Berg Zacharias (from Reader Contributions, 1994)

 

All the above have been obtained from Readers Digest.


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